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First Tee to Last Call: Masters Hangover

by Conor Coughlin

My favorite week of the year has come to an end.

First off, congratulations to Hideki Matsuyama on being the first Japanese male to win the Masters Tournament. What an amazing achievement!

He looked solid last week, so no surprise I wasn’t on him at all. Lots of letdowns and honestly a relatively boring Sunday. But nonetheless, I loved watching every minute of it.

Also, I want to point out how awesome it was to see his caddy bow to the course as a sign of respect. I thought that was such a great moment in Masters’ history. Just a classy move that I think flew a little under the radar. I was thoroughly impressed with how humble and respectful Matsuyama was after winning. These are the type of champions we need.

Masters Hangover

I do not possess a master’s degree in being hungover, though at times you might think I do. I’m also not talking about the hangover-like state that some people experience after riding high, watching this tournament all weekend.

I’m talking about the hangover I had from being on a party bus all weekend celebrating a birthday and taking in the tournament at several different bars. 

The first item I want to discuss is “Party Bus” etiquette. There are a few simple things you can do to have a good time and not ruin the fun for others:

  1. Bring supplies. DO NOT be the person who shows up empty-handed.
    “Can I have a beer?” No! You may not! I took the time to calculate how many beers I would need to get from sun up to sun down and you have now compromised my ability to stay hydrated. 
  2. Be prompt. When someone announces the bus is leaving for the next spot do not linger at the current venue. Finish your cocktail and load up.
  3. Do not get kicked out of the bar. We had a fellow partier get kicked out of not one but two bars. The first of which, the gentleman in question found it appropriate to then stand in the middle of the road trying to hitchhike while yelling at cars passing him by. Unbelievable that no one would stop to pick up a drunk guy screaming in the middle of the road. 
  4. Buy a round of drinks! Our group was awesome about this! Just take turns. Keeps everything moving at a good pace and makes life easy on the bar staff! 
  5. Tip your driver! They just put up with your nonsense for countless hours.

The second issue I want to address is how to deal with a hangover. There are many schools of thought on the topic. Here are a few ideas that have worked for me:

  1. Hydrate. This is the undisputed world champion of hangover cures. You need water. I know this can be a challenge to accomplish, but you have to get water into the desert you call a body. 
  2. If water isn’t your cup of tea then try to bounce back with a cocktail. I think this is the most challenging to pull off. If I don’t feel well, the last thing that makes me feel better is to re-up the poison in my body. However, if you go this route I like a Bloody Mary or a Screwdriver to kick off my day. 
  3. Eat food. You need nutrients. I’m a big believer in “the greasier the better.” If I have my choice, it’s a cheeseburger and fries. A close second would be pasta. Any pasta will do here. There are occasions that I try to preemptively eat, in which case I like pizza as a nightcap. There is truly nothing better than pizza at the end of the night.
  4. Don’t sleep all day. I have found that if I drag my corpse out of bed and force myself to face the day, I feel much better in a much shorter amount of time. This also helps to knock the hangover haze off of you. 
  5. Don’t tell everyone how hungover you are over and over again. We all know you’re hungover. We can tell. Mind over matter goes a long way. Convince yourself you’re fine and you will be! 

In my quest to shake off the hangover haze on a less than profitable Masters week, let’s get into some golf! 

This week we are at Harbour Town in Hilton Head, South Carolina. The course is just under 7,100 yards and is a par 71 with Bermuda grass throughout. The weather is looking a little rainy but the wind does not appear to be a factor at the time of this writing.

The defending champion is Webb Simpson who posted a -22 last year. I would expect the score to be somewhere around -15 this year. Ball-striking and approach are at a premium here and this course does require a lot of precision. 

RBC Heritage Field Picks 

Collin Morikawa ($10,500) 

When it comes to precision iron play and overall ball-striking, Collin Morikawa may be the best in the business. He rates out No. 1 in approach, No. 2 in shots gained ball-striking and No. 2 in greens in regulation over the last 24 measured rounds.

Morikawa is excellent from the key approach distances. If he has a weak spot it’s putting, but that is coming around over the last few tournaments. I see him being right near the top this week and I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised to see him win this tournament. 

Abraham Ancer ($8,900)

Abraham Ancer rates out No. 4 in my model overall. He finished in second place last year at this tournament. His ownership is coming in at about 24 percent, which I don’t love. but he is primed to win here. His game suits the course so well he’s hard to pass up. He is in the top 15 for every stat that I looked at. Ancer is generally very accurate and you can expect that to hold true this week. I recommend eating the chalk here and plugging him into your lineups.

Chris Kirk ($7,500)

Chris Kirk is coming in at No. 10 in my model. His recent form is trending in the right direction with only one missed cut in his last 12 starts and he has three top 10 finishes over the same stretch. He is No. 1 for par 4 scoring in the key distances for this course. I love him to make the cut and put up some DraftKings points and I think there’s a strong chance he finishes inside the top 10, as well. I’ll be overweight on Kirk this week for sure. 

Other Golfers I Like this Week

Webb Simpson ($10,700)

Daniel Berger ($10,000)

Tommy Fleetwood ($8,800)

Kevin Kisner ($7,700)

Matthew NeSmith ($6,900)

Dart Throws

Maverick McNealy ($6,700)

Tom Hoge ($6,400)

Thanks for reading, and good luck this week!

I use Fantasynational.com for analytics and statistical modeling. If you’re looking for an edge check them out!

Conor Coughlin @Cough_DFS

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